Monday, December 11, 2006

The Starpower Times: This Just In!

Update of an exclusive reported earlier here at The Starpower Times. Once again, my dad, reporter from the Lexington Bureau:


(Lexington) In a surprise move late this afternoon, the Board of Directors of Chimney Springs International, parent company of Chimney Springs Sporting Ventures LLC, issued the following statement:

"We wish to clarify certain actions undertaken recently at Chimney Springs since we believe current press accounts may have lead some to draw inaccurate or untoward conclusions. The Board of Chimney Springs International is resolute in its ongoing support for conservation efforts that sustain migratory fowl, globally and in Rockbridge County.

"It has come to our attention that Mr. M.L. Smith of our Rockbridge facility has somehow misinterpreted the installation of our latest artistic acquisition, the contemporary organic artwork, 'Taut Twines,' for some type of bird flight inhibiting device. Nothing could be further from the truth. We have advised Mr. Smith of the Board's dismay with this rash and presumptuous misinterpretation, and have urged him henceforth to devote greater and more timely attention to internal Chimney Springs memoranda.

"Blending performance art and living sculpture, 'Taut Twines' symbolizes the universal vexations of fly anglers everywhere as they struggle with omnipresent forces that seek to ensnare their back-casts. The artwork, specially commissioned by the Chimney Springs Board, will be on display through late February. Reflecting artistic influences as diverse as Christo, Minimalism and Home Depot, 'Taut Twines' speaks to the dichotomy inherent in virtually all contradictory dualities. The Board notes that the work's current placement at Chimney Springs is solely for maximum artistic impact, in homage to its inventive forebears, and in no way is intended to impair or impede local fauna."

When pressed for further details about Mr. Smith's future with Chimney Springs, a Board spokes said, somewhat cryptically: "We believe Mr. Smith's afternoon will be more productively spent away from the Mac, and perhaps back at the Nintendo."

4 Comments:

Blogger newyorquina said...

I just caught up on your whole blog, I´m stuck in the office trying to look, well present. Here´s some thoughts.

I wish we could go hear live music and drink in your neighborhood bar and pick up men.

I wish I knew who half the bands you mentioned were. (Wanna make me a cd?)

Aw but its alright now mama everybody must get stoned.

2:57 PM  
Blogger Madelyn said...

Yeah, make me a CD, too. You can even put a bow on it and call it a Christmas gift!

Re Dad -- I was quite impressed with the Christos reference!

3:15 PM  
Blogger Madelyn said...

Hello? tap tap tap. Hello? This blog on?

5:56 AM  
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